Regret & Redemption
by Atreides
Summary: DuoxHilde Duo wants Hilde to be happy, but what if not being in her life is the worst thing he could have done? I'm not sure where this story is going, so bear with me!
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: Gundam Wing isn't mine, as the usual disclaimer goes. But oh… if it was… I wouldn't be writing this!

Author's Note: I haven't written a Gundam Wing story in quite a while, so I'm a little hazy on specific details, so this will probably be a bit AU. Thanks for reading, and I always love comments/editing.

Regret & Redemption

It had been six years since the end of the war. Six years where Duo had made himself a living as a mechanic, running his own garage, finding that he couldn't stay away from all things mechanical. So maybe cars were his replacement for Shinigami, but nonetheless he found the hard physical labor pleasurable after the years of living on the edge of death. He hadn't kept in close touch with everyone from the war, something that he regretted. Quatre and Trowa were happy working at the Winner Foundation, Heero and Relena were busy with politics, and Wufei and Sally were still part of the Preventers. Which left him all by his lonesome, but he got along. Weekends were spent at various clubs and bars around the city, while the weekdays were spent slaving away at the garage.

He hadn't thought things would change, until one fateful dark stormy day when Hilde came hobbling into his garage. The lightning intermittently cast shadows on her bruised and bleeding face as she looked around the large room. Duo heard the door shut and scooted out from under the car he was working on, thinking that another customer was looking for help. As soon as she saw him she cried out softly and sunk to the floor. Nothing registered in his brain for a split-second, and then he was running across the room and cradling her in his arms as she silently wept. _What in the world happened to her? _Duo thought frantically, trying to calm her. She clung to him and as he held her he noticed she was pitifully thin and ice cold to the touch.

"Hilde, there's a couch in the back room, hold on to me," he softly commanded, not letting her disagree as he scooped her into his arms and carried her back where it was warmer and more comfortable.

They were silent as he put her down on the sofa and wrapped her in blankets. Questions flew through his head as he poured a cup of coffee from the machine and gave it to her, sitting down in a chair nearby.

"Hilde…." he had no idea how to ask what happened to her and so he trailed off, staring at her.

She didn't meet his gaze, but shakily held the coffee mug between her hands.

"I didn't know where to go," she whispered, tears welling in her eyes, "Noin and I…I thought we were perfect…"

Duo immediately knew what happened, and fire burned in his eyes, "She did this to you," he stated flatly, trying to keep his emotions in check.

"I didn't think she would ever do this to me, I loved her…at first it was wonderful, but then she started getting depressed and I couldn't help her. Nothing I did changed what she felt. And then she started getting angry, blaming me for her unhappiness, but I tried so hard," she let out a little sob, "I tried but nothing worked. And last night, she just exploded…"

"It was because of Treize, wasn't it?" Duo asked.

Duo had seen Noin gaze after Treize, but Treize never saw her love for him. In fact, he almost made a point of ignoring her after the war. So Noin went to Hilde, and Hilde being the kind caring person she was, she opened her heart to Noin. That was the reason why Duo had originally left and opened his garage, because by the time he had sorted out his feelings for Hilde she was already happy with Noin. And while Duo didn't want to ruin what they had, he also couldn't bear to be near them. All he cared about was her happiness, and if she was happier with Noin, then he had to let them be, and live without Hilde.

Hilde nodded her head slightly, "I knew she had feelings for him, but I thought she loved me and had forgotten him. But he never left her mind…and then he got married and she just…but I understand why she would do that. She was upset."

Duo couldn't believe his ears. After Hilde had been abused by Noin she was defending her. _Only Hilde could have such a large heart_, he thought sadly.

"I'll go get my first aid kit and some ice, just drink that coffee," he said and came back a few minutes later after finding everything he was looking for.

Hilde had curled pathetically into a ball on the couch, shivering with her hair covering her eyes. Duo's heart leapt out of his chest at the sight, and simultaneously swore that nothing would ever happen like this again to her.

"Here, you want me to help you?" he asked quietly, not wanting to scare her.

She sat up slowly, wincing from pain. "I'm okay. I just…I don't know what to do…"

"You obviously are not okay babe," Duo said protectively, "Hold onto this ice and we're going to go to my apartment where we can fix you up better."

With that said, he scooped her up again in his arms and carried her to his small pick-up truck, where he put her in the passenger seat. He ran to his office, scribbled a note: "Closed for the day," taped it to the door, and ran back to his truck and started it up. His apartment was only a five minute drive, spent in silence as Hilde looked out the window and Duo tried not to kill anyone.

He parked the truck and took her in his arms again, taking her up to his apartment. Hilde limply lay in his arms, not resisting but not helping him either. _I never thought I'd carry her this way to my apartment…_he thought. Once inside, he laid her on his bed. She was obviously exhausted from the night and morning of getting to his garage, and as soon as her head touched the pillow she was asleep.

Duo straightened up and thought his heart would break. Hilde was a mess and all because he hadn't stood up and spoke his feelings to her. He cleaned her face and bandaged it up, then moving to the rest of her body. Noin hadn't skimped on breaking Hilde. There was barely any skin that hadn't been bruised or was bleeding, and his tears softly fell onto the bed as he finished bandaging her. Duo pulled a chair next to the bed and gazed on her broken face until he drifted off to sleep, both of them dreaming nightmares but too tired to wake from the terror. And so the night crept onwards.

Regret & Redemption

I will probably continue this story, but I just wanted to get the beginning out to see what you readers have to say about it.


	2. Chapter 2

Author's Note: This story will probably take me a while to write, because I also have a ton of papers to write But here is the next (and a very short) chapter of:

Regret & Redemption

Duo woke up the next morning and immediately regretted not moving to the couch before he fell asleep. He felt like something had run him over, but as soon as he looked over at Hilde's still form, all his pains immediately left him. _Noin is going to regret even looking at Hilde_…he thought with anger.

He sighed softly and stood up slowly, stretching his bones back into place. He walked through the living room into the small kitchen and made a pot of coffee, figuring that he'd need lots of caffeine to get through the day. As he was making eggs Hilde hobbled in and sat down in one of the two chairs at the kitchen table. She looked like she'd been through hell and back.

Duo turned around as he flipped an egg in the pan, "How are you doin' babe?" he asked softly.

"I'm here," she replied blankly, staring at the wall next to Duo.

"I made eggs, I know they're your favorite," he said, hopeful that she'd eat.

"Thanks," was the only reply he got.

He knew he had to do something to get her out of her mind, otherwise she would just spiral down into someplace he didn't want to follow. He had been there before himself, before the war when he had to fight to survive. It wasn't a sane way of living, and he knew the hurt she was feeling bordered on insanity.

He dished out the eggs on black and red plates, set them down on the table.

"Orange juice, milk, water or coffee?" he asked, going to the cupboard again for a glass and mug.

"Orange juice," she answered, limply picking at the eggs.

Duo poured her a glass and got himself a mug of coffee, sitting across from her as he gave her the glass. They sat eating, Hilde less heartily than Duo, until Duo couldn't take the silence anymore.

"Hilde, I know this hurts, physically and emotionally, but you have so many friends that are here for you. We all really care about you and we'd do anything for you babe," he said, trying to pick the words without going too far.

"I know, it's just…I'm still shocked. It's not here yet," she said, tapping her head lightly, "She's everything to me."

Hilde's eyes left her plate and traveled down to the floor, and he could see tears hit her pants. He had no idea how to comfort her. It had been so long since he had seen her, and she'd changed so much. He knew he really would do anything for her though, and so he cleaned up the dishes, washing them and setting them to dry, trying to figure out what to say. Hilde just sat there, thoughts obviously running through her mind.

"Would it help to talk about it yet?" he asked, looking at her from the sink.

"I don't know," she said.

"How about let's go do something. Do you want to go shopping? You don't have any clothes here, and mine aren't quite your style," he said, trying to perk her up.

He knew that if there was one thing she couldn't refuse, it was shopping. Right after the war, when they were picking up the pieces and trying to make a semblance of a normal life, Hilde would always insist on going shopping with Duo, picking out all of the new trendy clothes for the both of them to try on. She seemed to have a sixth sense at what would look good and bad on Duo, and he actually still wore all the clothes she picked for him.

A little quirk flashed on her face and faded, and she nodded her head, "You haven't bought any new clothes since we went shopping before, have you?" she asked with a straight face.

Duo dramatically winced, "Okay, okay, so what if I have no pleasure in trying tons of clothes on just to find the perfect shirt? With you here I can get rid of everything with holes in them."

"And basically everything else. You really look horrible, you know that? Your shirt definitely went out of fashion four years ago," she stated matter-of-factly.

"I get the point! Sheesh…I guess we'd better get going before people start laughing at me from the streets," he said, looking at her pitifully, as if his life was about to end at that instant.

Her face lost its dark depression for a second, and she nodded. Duo mentally made a note of that, and they left the apartment and got into the truck. It took about ten minutes to get the mall, and Duo was thankful that he hadn't decided on living out in the middle of nowhere. He asked her about her job, and she told him the problems she had trying to find something that fit. She had been a hostess at a five-star restaurant, a pilot at an obscure airline, a radio talk show host, and been at a multitude of other random jobs until she had decided that she wanted to be a veterinarian.

"A veterinarian?" he asked when they entered the mall.

"We went through the war and there was so much anger and war and evilness. And who got the blunt end of it? Animals. They couldn't even protect themselves. I want to help them out because I feel bad," she answered.

_Only Hilde would think about the animals' points of views and want to help them, _he thought warmly, "Well, where are we starting?" he asked.

"Oh, I don't know, let's just follow the route of the mall and see where it leads us," she said, taking the lead.

_I really hope I'm not going to regret this…_he thought as they entered the first store.


End file.
